Living with Risk

A few years ago there was a movie starring Ben Stiller and Jennifer Aniston called "Along Came Polly."  In this movie Ben Stiller was a risk analyst for an insurance company, a person who looked at a person's life and determined if they were too risky to insure.  In the end, he comes to the conclusion that all of life is a risk and we can't isolate ourselves from everything dangerous.

I believe we've become a "riskless" people.  We strive so hard to make ourselves safe from everything, burrowing ourselves into the ground and hiding from everything that might prevent us from living to be 100.  In doing so, we limit our effectiveness for the Kingdom of God.  By eliminating risk, we tell God that we aren't willing to depend on him for everything.

I'm finishing up a book by Francis Chan called "Crazy Love."  This read has been a combination of joy and conviction, reveling in the love of God and then immediately facing the conviction of my pathetic response to this love.  In the last chapter of the book, Chan talks about our desire to build up a safety net that will catch us just in case God doesn't come through.  I pray this isn't what my life is like.  I understand about responsibility and taking care of my family, but I pray I lead my family to rely on God.  I pray we rely on God so much that if he doesn't come through, we fail miserably.  I think of Job, the kind of pain he went through.  I pray my response to every situation is "The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away.  Blessed be the name of the Lord."

I pray I never fear risk.

The Persistance of the Church

I wonder how long churches are supposed to be incorporated. If the church is really the people, then why does First Baptist Church of Anywhere last for 200 years or more? Why aren't churches more fluid and organic, living while the people who started it are alive and transitioning to something else as the people die away. I don't believe this is heretical or even mean. I'm just trying to understand the nature of the church as a body.

As I think about this, I'm trying to understand what the original intent of the church was supposed to be. As I read scripture, I'm convinced that the church is much more of an organic body than a static structure. If the body doesn't change and grow, it stagnates and dies. In my mind, I'm beginning to wonder if that means a body should morph into something else as members die away and new life comes into it. If a church is really the people, this seems to be the only way it can persist. It must change, it must grow, painfully if necessary. The church is alive, it is moving. To limit its growth or its ability to redirect its focus is to risk killing it altogether.

Perhaps churches shouldn't try to exist for hundreds of years. Perhaps churches should be planted with the mindset that after a certain amount of time they would re-incorporate as something different, a new body with a new mindset.

If we began to view the church as a living organism and not a static body, I believe it would help us understand what and who we're supposed to be as individuals. I think we would be more loving as a people and less interested in maintaining our political power. I think establishment breeds pride and apathy, two things that bring about destruction wherever they are allowed to exist.

I'm not completely sure how to process all of this, just an thought I had this morning.

Going to Mars

I think we as the human race should put forth an effort to go to Mars.

I know this sounds ridiculous to most people, but the human timeline of history has been a list of discoveries. In the past, discovery was all about beating someone else, being the first person or nation to do something or go somewhere. Now it seems there is no more competition to do anything, except make more money so we can better rule the world. What has happened to our sense of awe with creation? Why would we not want to learn more about the universer we're in?

I remember in school being overwhelmed by space. I loved studying space and the history of space travel. I own the HBO miniseries "From the Earth to the Moon." I am still awed by the space travel that happened 40 years ago. July 20 of this year marks the 40th anniversary of man's landing on the moon. After a few short trips (only 12 people have ever set foot on the moon) the lunar program was cancelled. Since then, space travel has been limited to low-earth orbit, space stations, and telescopes that don't always work right away. We've sent probes to other countries and even out of the solar system, but no man has left the gravitational pull of the earth in over 30 years.

Isn't there something to be said for exploration just to see what's out there? Isn't there something exciting and stirring about that? Or have we all become so crass and cynical as to only be moved by financial gain anymore?

I ask these questions because to me there is a greater thing at risk. If we fail to be awed by the physical universe around us, what's to keep us from failing to be awed by an invisible God? I'm sure some pious people will tell me that we're not supposed to worship creation but the Creator. I understand that and I don't believe that's my mistake. I believe that by being dazzled by creation we are being awed by the Creator himself, by the work he has done.

I believe we should go to Mars.

What Kind of Day Has It Been

Disciple Now 2009 is over. As I recover from the many hours spent planning and pick up and put away decorations, stage sets, and various other bits lying around, I pause to reflect on what we experienced. The theme for the weekend was "One." It dealt with pursuing our relationship with God, our Father. We asked of our students nothing more and nothing less than them pursuing and maintaining an intimate relationship with God. Like any of us has to work on our marriage or the relationship with our children or our parents or our employer, we must work on our relationship with God. We challenged beliefs and the status quo. I'm sure we offended some people. I pray only that the Spirit of God was heard.

I've never experienced the kind of effort that went into this event. Not that we tried to contrive anything, but just the planning and execution of a community-wide event of this nature required a lot of work, work I never dreamed of. I've never spent so much time in prayer for an event. I've never seen people in the community get as involved as they did in this event. There were three sponsor churches involved, but at least 8 churches represented by students. I even had one couple volunteer their house and they attend a church in another city. It was remarkable how that worked out because the husband and oldest daughter of this family turned out to be on a prayer team for a tribe in Africa that the group leader in their house had just spent two weeks with this past January. Though I expect things like this to happen, I never cease to be amazed at how God chooses to work.

This past weekend we experienced a moving of God. As with any movement of the Spirit, lives are changed. How much and for how long largely depends on the individual's response and commitment. This is always the intangible you long to know, but for which you can never plan. My only prayer in that is that each of us will take what the Lord revealed to us and put in to action in our own lives.

What kind of day has it been? It's been a good day. Now I rest in the arms of the Father.

A Change is Gonna Come

You know that place between something old and something new? That place where you can sense a change is coming, but you don't know what or when it is? That's where I am right now. It seems to me that change is coming, but I don't know what it will be or when it will arrive. It's one of these things that you wish would go ahead and happen. Even if it's difficult and painful, at least it would be here and I could get on with my life. I know there's a lesson in the waiting and surely there's some wisdom to be gleaned from being patient, but come on already. I know that life is a journey and not just random events placed at random places, but it sure can get frustrating in the mean time.

In a rather humerous coincidence this reminds me of National Lampoon's Vacation. In what is obviously a spoof on family vacations during the height of family vacationing, Chevy Chase determines to take his family to Wally World in California. His family lives in Chicago. Instead of flying, which is obviously what one would do if one was a successful food-additive exec, he decides to drive. What ensues is a comedy of errors as the family encounters set-back after set-back on their journey.

Why do these two things coincide? I'm not entirely sure, but there's got to be something in there about the journey being fun. In my own life I've not been so concerned with the journey as the destination. I always want to just get there so I can partake in all the destination has to offer me. Then it's get back home as quickly as possible. My parents and now my wife are always gracious with me, but I think they would have appreciated it more if I had enjoyed the journey a little bit. I can think of one instance when my wife and I had not been married for even a year. We had gone skiing and were driving home. We left Denver, CO at probably 9:00am, not rushing out the door. We had predetermined to stop somewhere around Wichita Falls, TX to spend the night. When we arrived at Wichita Falls, it was only 6:30pm or so. After stopping for supper and not feeling too tired, we decided to push on to Ft. Worth. We would get a room there. When we got to Ft. Worth, it was probably 10:00 or so. and me in my wisdom and hurry to get home (also secretly not wanting to buy another hotel room) I decided that since we were so close, we might as well go on home. Being on the far west side of Ft. Worth and driving all the way to Marshall, we arrived home between 1:30 or 2:00am. Amanda didn't talk to me much the next day, probably because we both were too tired to say anything.

The point being, and answering my own angst, perhaps I should just shut up already. It sure would be nice if the change revealed itself to me, though.

No Perfect People Allowed

I'm reading a book by this title written by John Burke, a pastor in Austin, TX.  I am convicted by my lack of authenticity and transparency with those around me.  I  constantly hold back for fear that people won't like me or worse still, think that I am not as good as they used to think I was.

I fall prey to the lie that I am a good person.  I fall prey to the menace that is Pharisaism.  I fall prey to my own pride, that I don't want to admit I am not as good as I want everyone to think. This book has changed the way I perceive relationships.  It's been a long time coming, but it seems I've found something that puts into words what I've been trying to articulate to myself for a while.  It's also nice to have some confirmation of my own beliefs by someone I have never spoken with once.

I desire to live in a real community with other believers.  In a narrative that often reads like a setting for a support group, Pastor Burke has written about whole-ness that has come through honesty and openness between people.  Perhaps this is what a church is supposed to be, a support group for broken, searching people.  Becoming whole together, while each on our own journey.  Through an atmosphere of love and acceptance, we see people open up to the gospel like they never would have if confronted with the poise and eloquence of a televangelist.

I thank God that I can still learn.  I wish these concepts had been made clear to me 15 years ago. I wish I didn't have to struggle to find the truth.  I pray that I become the man God wants me to be.  I am becoming more and more haunted by the phrase the Apostle Paul writes to the church in Corinth, "I have become all things to all people that by all means I may save some."  I am afraid I am not all things to all people.  I can hear the longing in the heart of Paul that none would perish without knowing the love of God.  More and more this is what I desire for myself.

Flag-football results

Thought I would let everyone know about the results of the flag-football game we had the other day. I know you all just can't wait.

The students got the drumming they so richly deserved, 78-48. There was some talk that the adults only scored 68 points, but this is simply misguided propaganda. In fact, 42 of the students' points came in the 2nd half, when all of us were stiff and tired because we failed to stretch before we came back out on the field.

Anyway, we had a good time and it was fun to fellowship like that across generational boundaries.